39 Orbits...



I never pictured how I'd feel at different ages. I remember once my mother said to me, “You’ll be twenty in the year 2000.” I turned twenty-one that year, and it didn’t feel any different than the year before. I feel like the most recent birthday that felt any different to me was last year when I visited Winchester Cathedral and the Mary Rose. Prior to that my birthdays from age twelve to the present were largely unremarkable. I want them to be remarkable, but I think that once you get to a certain age they cease to feel special. Maybe it’s the lack of presents, or the lack of fanfare. For me, birthdays are difficult. I’m often reminded of what I’ve lost or speculate on what could have been.

            I’ll turn forty next year, which scares the hell out of me. I feel like I haven’t done much in the decades I’ve been alive. It wasn’t until I started traveling that I felt like I started to do much of anything. I’ve always written but have yet to publish anything. I’ve tried on so many different hats and so many different interests, that I sometimes don’t know where to turn. There’s never been any “one thing” that I’ve always been fixated on doing. Outside of writing there’s so many interests that I don’t always have the time for them. I started taking up chess again, and already feel the pull of other interests. I don’t think it’s from restlessness. It’s more a sense of wanting to know and experience as much as I can while I can. It’s not just mortality, it’s also money, time, patience, and wanting to know that it wasn’t all wasted. These are all factors as to which time-consuming interest I pursue next. God knows there’s never enough time.

            I saw an interview once with Chevy Chase (it was on the Tavis Smiley Show). He was asked about leaving SNL, and how moving to L.A. affected his career. He said, “You will lose perspective at some point. What you lose in perspective you’ll gain later in retrospective.”

            I saw that as a cautionary tale, and thought, “Well, I’d best not lose perspective.”

            I listened to Mr. Griswold but didn’t really heed his advice. He was right, I lost perspective in my twenties. I’ve been piecing together information from retrospective since then. I think that’s something that some people are fortunate enough to do. There are others who are not so fortunate, and they just sort of stumble through life in a fog. They don’t think beyond the next millisecond, and don’t seem to realize how important everything they say and do really is.

            I’m reminded of another quote. “Do you see that man who has just skipped out of the way of the tram? Consider, if he had been run over, how significant every act of his would at once become. I don’t mean for the police inspector. I mean for anybody who knew him. And his thoughts, for anybody that could know them…”--James Joyce.

            Every second counts because you may not have very many seconds left. I try to make every second count. Sometimes I fail at that. Sometimes I say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing. Sometimes I lead with my heart and not my head. Then I try my best to fix everything because I fear time will run out. I don’t want to lay on my deathbed, and think, “I really should have done this or that.” I want to live a thousand lives and outlast the clock.

            I could go on and be existential about it. As if I already haven’t. The point is…A lot has happened in the past ten years. Some of which I wish hadn’t happened. There are some things I regret. Some things that could have been handled better. Some decisions that weren’t as well thought out, or that blew up in my face later. Like any of us I’m flying blind most of the time, and hoping I land in Shangri-La. If I had to do it all over again there are some things I would have done differently. There were some things that couldn’t be avoided. There are still other things that could have easily been avoided. I’m still learning. I’m still breaking free from bad habits that were acquired in the past.

            There is still much to learn. I’m not done yet.

            Copyright Riley Joyce 2018.
           
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