The Phantom of the Living Room
The Phantom of the Living Room
I've never seen a ghost. I
also don't believe that they exist. While I believe in the human
soul, I don't think it manifests itself in repetitive reenactments of
one's death. Though we have such stories from various cultures, that
doesn't make ghosts any more real. They are real to the believer, and
unreal to the non-believer. Believing is seeing.
My mother and I once rented
the first floor of a house built in 1922. Much of the building was
updated, as it had been split into apartments in modern times. We had
a large living room/kitchen, dining room, master bedroom, and a
basement with washer and dryer. We also had a small backyard, where
my mother kept a garden. It's fairly typical of old houses in the
Pittsburgh area that were built after WWI, and before WWII. I liked
the old charm of the house, though it had largely renovated. Still, I
had a sense of what it looked like back in its heyday. There was a
small, non-working fireplace in my bedroom, with a large mantle
above; which I believe was one of the last remainders of the original
structure.
Prior to the move to the
first floor, my mother rented an apartment on the second floor. This
was a nice-sized apartment as well, which had more intact fixtures of
the original building. For example, the bathroom door was
authentically from 1922, complete with brass doorknob, and keyhole.
It also had a transom above the door, which still worked. Outside of
that, the rest of the second floor had been largely renovated, and
looked very new for the 1990's.
My mother once told me of a
strange experience she'd had in the living room.
It was a hot summer
evening, and so she had the living room window open, as the apartment
did not have central air. The glow of the TV bathed the room in gray
light, as my mother gently drifted off to sleep. She dozed on the
sofa, and woke up several hours later.
She told me the following.
“When I woke up, there
was a man looking at me. He sat right there (pointing to the rocking
chair next to me) and he was dressed in old time clothes. His shirt
didn't have a collar, and he had on a vest. He had a mustache like my
father had.”
This clearly wasn't her
father, he was living in a different neighborhood, and still very
much alive at time.
It was also around this
time that my niece, Rachel, was reluctant to enter the apartment. She
would scream any time my sister brought her for a visit. She an
infant at the time, so I assumed it was because her baby carrier may
have been jostled by the trip up the narrow staircase. Her mother
thought it was odd. My mother sister, who didn't children yet have
children, also thought it was odd. My mother took note of it, and
tried to link to two together.
My personal theory is that
Mom had a waking dream. This is when your body says, “I'm awake,”
but your brain says to you, “I'm not done watching this program.
Give me five more minutes!” You are sort of awake, but not
entirely. Your brain clouds your perception, and creates a mild
hallucination. You are still dreaming, and yet partly conscious. I've
had a few of them myself, but usually they take on the form of me
talking nonsensically (more so than usual). Though visual glitches of
this sort are very common.
I don't believe my mother
saw a real ghost. Instead, she saw a ghost of the mind. The gray glow
of the TV screen probably didn't help either. It would have also been
beneficial to know what she'd been watching before she fell asleep.
Or, better still, what she'd been dreaming. At that time I was
reading a fair bit of James Joyce, Jane Austen, Bronte sisters, and
Edgar Allan Poe. It's more likely I would have hallucinated a ghoul
in a waistcoat. Or, preferably, a comely specter in a bodice!
Alas, said specter has not
materialized. What I wouldn't have given to be Ray Stantz in that
dream sequence. The macabre fantasies of teenage youth!
Anyway...ectoplasm emissions aside, I've not seen a single ghost,
ever.
I revisited the house on
what would have been my mother's seventieth birthday. I was sad to
see that it had been boarded up, and disused. The windows had been
smashed in, and replaced with plywood. What had once been my bedroom,
with large front window, now received no sunlight. The light blue
paint of the wooden siding had faded. The side porch where I used to
read, and drink tea, was now rotted and vacant. However, my memories
of the place were very much intact.
I remember watching the
X-Files with my mother on Friday nights. I remembered watching reruns
of Leonard Nimoy's In Search Of...when I'd visit her on the weekends.
She'd nap in the back bedroom, while I would do up the dishes, and
make tea. It was in that kitchen that I learned her secret pork chop
recipe, as well as how to cook a good steak. I also experienced the
delicacy of ginger snaps dunked in tea! Yes, that sounds strange, but
it tastes amazing; especially in winter. The ginger warms you right
up!
It was sad to see that
house unloved, and empty. I hoped a family, or at least new tenants
would have occupied it. The old landlord had sold it years ago, and
whoever owned it now didn't seem to care. That to me is more haunting
than any ghost, real or imagined.
Copyright Riley Joyce 2016
The photo at the top of this post is of the ceramic haunted house my mother made in the early 1980's. It's been with me ever since.
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